Some have described reunion as the most electric and magnificent feeling when you meet for the first face to face meeting. They may have felt that the bonding was immediate, warm, and genuine. You may feel whole and complete after the first meeting. Natural mothers may feel that they have no more pain of wondering if the child they relinquished to adoption healthy and happy. Realizing the resemblance of each other and mutual interests can bring on joyful emotions. There may be feelings of relief and peace of mind that may bring happy tears that you may not even realize you had within yourself. It truly is a life changing event that can change triad members life for the better.

For me, I found the family of my natural mother. My natural mother died 15 months prior to my completing my search for her. A little over a month after making contact with my natural family we were celebrating the holidays together. Many stories, photos, and videos of my natural mother were shared during that holiday season. I was graciously welcomed into a warm, loving, friendly group. I even received a few mementos that had belonged to my natural mother. I enjoyed the visits that I had with my natural mother’s sister. These are some of the times that I hold close to my heart.

Some may be in shock when they are first contacted by their natural mother or the child they relinquished to adoption. Some have described it as difficult to express the feelings that well up at the time. Some may feel numb, scared, confused, sad and elated at the same time, if that makes any sense. You may be trying to fight back tears.

Many choose a neutral place for their first face to face reunion. From when you decide on a time and place to that time arrives you may feel as if time goes by so slowly and that it would never get here. When the day arrives you may feel petrified and have second thoughts. It is important to remember that you waiting for x number of years for this moment and you have spent some agonizing hours searching and hitting dead ends. It was all worth the effort because the result is that you now get to meet your natural mother or the child you relinquished to adoption.

Some share stories and photographs during their first meeting and this may be when you first learn of other siblings. Some may be living and some may be deceased. Learning of siblings may be a shock and interesting to learn how similar you are to your sibling not only in physical appearance but also in some of your likes and dislikes such as clothes, music, and even mates.

During your first meeting you may establish where the first meeting is going to take you. Some decide that they would like to keep the relationship simple. Adoptees aren’t looking for another mother. Natural mothers can’t make up for lost time but if given a chance they can start from this point to be a friend.