As you regular readers know, my husband and I are in the midst of the adoption process with hopes of welcoming into our home a newborn infant. We don’t know exactly when but if all works according to plan the baby will be released from the hospital and placed into our home without foster care being involved.

The reason I am bring this up is to make a point. The only way that my husband and I will have a child is through adoption. The reality is that after several failed pregnancies it is not going to happen naturally and our desire to be parents outweighs the desire to have a biological child.

That said, my being an adoptee and trying to look beyond the adoption issues to get where we are today has been a struggle but, in the end, it is all going to be worth it. It has taken me some time and lots of research to find an agency that we are comfortable with that didn’t make us feel like we were receiving a sales pitch or that we were buying a child. Along with the adoption process comes fees and the agency we are working with doesn’t believe in high fees beyond the costs of adoption that are required by state law like a home study, which, by the way, is highway rip off. We may have to cover some medical expenses, but that is neither here nor there.

We have shared our impending parenthood with many friends and family members. Some are triad members and it is funny to see and hear their reactions. We are learning who are “friends” are and continuing to grow as a couple and individually. Our family is extremely supportive and excited and many of our friends are as well. It is those in the adoption search and support community that I thought would be supportive that we are finding really aren’t. It is sad that this has been our experience but it has taught me one thing.

Adoption is never going to go away. It is always going to be an available option unlike other options. You don’t see bills being introduced in the house or senate banning adoption but you do see them banning abortion. Does that analogy make sense?