Sheesh, life can be "iffy" too, right? This article offers several reunion stories and references the uncertainty of reunions. Although I am not wild about the less than positive title of this story, I always enjoy reunion stories. For people considering a search, reading about reunions may serve to assure you that many of your feelings are very normal. People considering a search may need to understand that they are not alone, and that many others feel as they do.

Some strong advocates of search and reunion always like to present reunions in a wholly positive light. Although I do enjoy happy reunion stories, I think that it is better to provide a balance. Reunions do vary a great deal, and people considering a search need to proceed with their eyes wide open. They will be better prepared if they are aware of the various possibilities.

The best way to learn about reunions is to talk to others who are reunited. Most people love to share their reunion stories and hearing them is an education in itself. Hearing other reunion stories helps to reinforce that many of the same feelings and thoughts are common to those who search and/or reunite.

This particular article mentions that state law changed in Alabama in the year 2000 and easier access to records has helped facilitate some reunions. A search specialist with the state (who is an adoptee)says that she has been able to locate a birth parent in 60% of her cases. She also mentions that about 15% object to having contact.

This article quotes social worker, Suzanne Peden, who says:

"...it's not unusual for the birth mother to not want contact with the child she put up for adoption, according to Suzanne Peden, a licensed social worker and director of A Angel Adoptions in Helena."

Her comments do not jibe with statistics, including the ones mentioned in this article. If only 15% of birth parents refuse contact, I am not certain that would qualify as being "usual". Not all social workers think alike, but it does seem in adoption that many are not optimistic about reunions. The fact that the social worker is also employed by an adoption agency is noteworthy as well.