Could you imagine initiating your search and after a few weeks or months finding out that your birth mother was a co-worker? I can’t imagine but it happened to an adoptee and a natural mother in Ill.. The article appeared in the Quad City Times on June 16, 2006. You can view the article in it’s entirety at http://www.quadcitytimes.com/articles/2006/06/19/news/local/doc4496476505b09764127530.txt

The article states that the adoptee worked in a hair salon 10 years ago and had shared the fantasy of sending her natural mother a coupon for a free manicure. The adoptee never initiated a search until late last year when she had a blood test done that was required to obtain health insurance. Her cholesterol level came back unusually high for someone her age and sparked her to initiate the search for her natural mother.

The article doesn’t really state how the search was completed but explains that the adoptee learned her natural mother was a receptionist at the hair salon at the same time she shared her fantasy with the other stylist and manicurist.

Although, the story has a positive outcome, the article itself had a negative comment that hasn’t’ sat well with me. The article states that “This is the kind of reunion that adoption professionals say can be rate. Biological parents often don’t want to revisit memories of an unplanned pregnancy. Adoptees often fear they will learn they share genes of criminals or substance abusers.”

I would really like to know who these “adoption professionals” are. Sure, adoptees have fears when they are searching and yes, there are searches that end where an adoptee finds these types of troubled individuals however, to say that the type of reunion described in the article is rare is a stretch in my eyes. Sure there are natural mothers who don’t want to be found for various reasons including that it is to painful for them to go to that place but again, I think the number of natural mothers that feel that way is rather low in comparison to the natural mothers who want to be found.

Search and reunion is an emotional roller coaster. There are ups and downs and there are times that these ups and downs are not easy but it is all part of the stages of reunion and the healing process. Adoption reunion and all that comes with it may be one of the most difficult experiences in our lives but I strongly believe it is so worth it.