Supporting a Birth Mom at Reunion – Part 2 of 3

June 23rd, 2006

6. Understand that reunion is between a birth mother and her child. It is inappropriate to attempt to make her feel guilty as though by reconnecting with her child, she is somehow usurping the adoptive parents’ role or being unfair or cruel to them. Reunion is not all about the adoptive parents, and they should not be the main focus. It is most likely that she knows that reunion may pose some uncomfortable times for the adoptive parents. She is probably quite sensitive to their feelings. The last thing she needs is for her friends and family to lay a guilt trip on her and insinuate that she is wrong to reconnect with her child because it… [more]

Supporting a Birth Mom at Reunion – Part 1 of 3

June 23rd, 2006

No one has perfect words to offer to a birth mom at reunion. There are none. I blogged awhile back about . "What Not to Say to a Reunited Birth Mom." Here are a few suggestions that might be better received and more helpful to a birth mom in reunion. 1. “That must have been very difficult for you.” When I told a few people after reunion that I had surrendered a son to adoption, some people very simply let me know that they imagined that it must have been a hard thing to do. They left it at that and didn’t blather on saying a lot of really insensitive, uninformed comments. All they did was indicate to me… [more]