Meeting the Adoptive Mom After Reunion – Part 2

February 27th, 2007

My husband and I were staying in a cottage nearby and had driven over to check out the town the day before. Checking the town out the day before our meeting was a really good idea, as that first time in the town that my son grew up in was an unexpected and extremely emotional experience. I was surprised at how difficult it was for me. Time was passing and it was time to pick up the roses. They looked great and I was ready to find her house. It was then I discovered that I had left the directions back at the cottage. I wanted to panic and cry, yet it was important not to mess this visit up. My cell had no… [more]

Meeting the Adoptive Mom After Reunion – Part 1

February 27th, 2007

Since my son's other mother(his adoptive mom) lives several states away, we have only met once so far. Our first meeting took place 2-3 years ago. The details of our meeting are vivid in my mind. Although I appeared calm, inside I was a wreck on the day of our visit. I wanted to meet her alone, so we agreed that I would drive to her home and then walk into town for lunch. The thought of seeing her with our son was not something I was ready to face yet; I thought it would wound me to the core. I knew that they were close and I felt that seeing their closeness would be too painful. For me, it was very important to… [more]

Meeting the Other Parents

February 21st, 2007

Adoptive and birth parents do not always meet even when a reunion occurs. However, it can be beneficial for both sets of parents to meet each other. Sometimes adoptive and birth parents from closed adoptions meet and form a warm relationship. It seems that is not the usual outcome. Although I do know of a few instances in which that is the case, it is more likely that both sets of parents do not meet or they meet yet there is a great deal of tension between them and relations are strained. There are a variety of reasons why the adoptive and birth parents of a child may not become friendly towards each other. While I do not believe that it is necessary… [more]