ADOPTEE GRANNIE ANNIE

NEEDS MIRACLE

Please Forward Me Everywhere!

Granny Annie aka Anita Field has been searching since 1993 and has gone through the usual channels with no success. In fact, she has tried more than the traditional methods to find any birth family members. She successfully petitioned the court and obtained her birth records. However, since her adoption was a gray market adoption, she knows that some of the information on her records is... more

Like “location, location, location” in real estate, timing is crucial in adoption search and reunion. Although you may choose to search when the timing is optimal for you, there is no way of knowing whether the timing is right for the person that you are searching for. You cannot know, so you take a leap of faith and hope for the best.

Since you do not know about the other party, you need to figure out when the timing is right for you and hope that your birth family member is ready as well. Although it helps to prepare yourself before... more

Step 5 is to obtain your non-identifying ("Non-id")information. This information will generally come from the adoption agency or the state. Although the non-id is designated to provide information, it is not generally enough to locate birth parents or adoptees. However, later on in a search some of its clues can help to verify that you have the correct person. This link will direct you to some previous blogs about the non-id information.

Nearly every... more

Step Four is to sign up with free registries.

The most highly recommended registries to begin with are:

1.International Soundex Reunion Registry (aka Soundex) is one of the most popular free international registries. It also is highly publicized and has an impeccable reputation for quick matches and honesty.

2. Reunite.com - The registry at reunite.com (a division of adoption.com)is also well known and successful. They have... more

The reality of adoption search and reunion whether it is an international adoption search or not adoption search is complex and intense. I think most triad members would agree that the experience of search behind them that search is positive and the right of every adoptee. If you choose to search, you should be mature and prepared for the overwhelming emotions that may be difficult to understand and process at times.

Another important thing to realize is that nothing can be controlled. Circumstances and unknown variables will dictate... more

The language barrier may be an issue and it is important to have a successful conversations. Where your international search is taking place, English may not be their first language so it may be necessary to locate a resource that can translate communications and is competent in reading between the lines of answers that are given or perhaps withheld.

Adoption search may be more accepted in the United States but the concept of search for adoptees and others in the adoption triad is not easily understood and may still be considered... more

This post by an adoptee who is searching is a "must read." I would mention the name of her blog, but it contains a word that I am fairly certain is taboo. Just found her blog recently and read several insightful posts that I liked a great deal.

Maybe part of why I enjoy her posts is her bluntness. Also, I understand her sense of humor. Be forewarned that if you are super-sensitive, her language might offend you. If it does, keep it to yourself or tell... more

Step 3 is to determine the laws in the state where the adoption took place. Start here and then follow the link at the bottom of this page for state specific information.

For the most current and up-to-date information about adoption access in your state, go to your state's website and see what your state has to offer to assist you in your search. Laws about adoption access are changing and some guides which list access laws do... more

Step 2 is creating a support system to share your search and/or reunion with you.

Developing a strong support system as you navigate through your adoption search and reunion can be a crucial step in a successful experience. Although some family members may be supportive, chances are that they may not be able to comprehend what you are going through. If you educate them along the way, that can help tremendously. When you encounter family members who are not supportive and seem unwilling or interested in being educated, if it is possible... more

Although I have discussed how to begin a search, a step by step series might be helpful.

Step One is preparing yourself for a search.

By preparing yourself, I mean to educate yourself about the possible outcomes. Many searching adoptees are thoroughly forewarned about a multitude of dire possibilities. Although it is helpful to be prepared for the darkest and most unexpected outcomes, I sometimes think we neglect to discuss possible positive outcomes. I believe that some adoptees are more prepared to find nightmare... more