Taking the time for you as an adoptee to go through a decision making process that involves your own thoughts does not make you a selfish spoiled person. It is also okay to think about the spiritual aspects of your placement.

For some your religious identify may be an important part of who you are. For those who have strong religious faith and who identify with that faith there can be some powerful thoughts in the process of rediscovery.

I was the searcher and honestly can say if the tables were reversed I would have mixed feelings about being... more

Like I was saying open records is a civil right not unlike the struggles of black people fifty years ago. A Martin Luther King, Jr., saying that people are seeking justice, that they are asking for what is right. A Malcom X saying that they are demanding their due, by any means necessary. Both understandable, although one is more intimidating than the other.

There was also a third person half a century ago--Rosa Parks. Ms. Parks, you'll recall, was the lady who refused to sit in the back of the bus. She was arrested, and history points to that... more

Written by Phil Ruggiero Jr.

NOTE: I received this recently from an adoptee in regards to the recent legislation and a question that I posed to him asking him what his thoughts were on the NJ legislation that passed the Senate on December fourth. With his permission, it has been printed here. He makes some excellent points and I hope you will share your thoughts with us as well.

The tenth dimwit reference is to Marley's latest bastardette blog, in which she names and quotes nine enemies of open records in NJ.

Currently,... more

There are many adoptees who didn’t learn that they were adopted until later in life. Some may be in their late 30’s, 40’s, 50’s, or even older. These adoptees are referred to as Late Discovery Adoptees. Often times these adoptees learn of their adoption after the death of their adoptive parents. One of the challenges facing these adoptees is the dearth of information on discovering one is adopted later in life.

Ron Morgan is an adoptee who found out he was adopted in 1991 at the age of 36. In the past 15 years he has been in contact with hundreds... more

I came across a hoge poge of statistic that I just found interesting and thought I would share with you.

A) Alabama, Alaska, Kansas, New Hampshire, Oregon, Tennessee: In these states adoptees are able to access their original birth records. B) Delaware: Since 1999, adoptees have been able to get access to their records in Delaware unless a birth parent opts to remain anonymous. By 2004, a total of 556 adult adoptees received copies of their original birth certificates, and 16 birth parents refused to consent to the release of information.... more

Visit http://members.cox.net/patrickm/enter.html to view the coming year's calendar as well as a selection of greeting cards.

The calendar and cards capture in words and images some of the unique ideas, thoughts, and feelings involved in adoption which are so often difficult to express, and they feature some excellent photography, as well as a caption for each photo for each month. The calendar is 8 1/2 x 5 1/2 folded, 8 1/2 x 11 hanging and is priced at $14 each.

They make... more

The adoptive father had died a few years prior to the natural mother making contact and the adoptee had an estranged relationship with his adoptive mother. The adoptee and his natural mother talked frequently in the beginning. The adoptee told the natural mother that he didn’t want his adoptive mother to find out he was talking to her because he didn’t think she would support any contact between the two of them.

This natural mother decided to respect that the adoptee knows that his natural mother loves him and wants nothing more than to meet him, hold... more

This natural mother feels that although her baby was not conceived in love the baby was carried in love and it was in love that she hid her pregnancy so that she could give him life. She loved this baby and she knew that her baby was going to a couple who loved him as much as she did, a couple who could provide form her baby what she could not.

This natural mother cried daily and wanted so badly to change her mind and take her baby back but she knew in her heart of hearts that being that young she could not provide for him. She didn’t have a job or... more

Another story is of a 13 years old female who was raped. This is how she lost her virginity and she got pregnant and had never even had her first period. She was raped, stabbed more times than she could count and was found unconscious by a friend. The 13 year old made her friend swear not to tell her parents. The 13 year old was scared that her dad wouldn’t love her anymore because she wasn’t a virgin. The reason she thought this was that her 17 year old sister had lost her virginity resulting in a strained relationship between her and her dad. She was... more

The subject of adoption and rape is often not discussed and actually dates courage to discus this. It is an important issue that many have to deal with and up until recently has been hidden and secretive. Rape and it’s after affects secret makes most rape victims feel ashamed as if it is their fault that they were assaulted. However, bringing it into the open helps victims heal.

I have heard of several stories involving rape and adoption. I will share one or two with you here. The first story is where two men broke into a home where a woman and... more