Back in June, I posted an article that was written by a very dear friend, Nathlie Troland and the subject was Disenfranchised Grief. The blog was a three part series and they can be found at http://birthfamily-search.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/grief-and-disenfranchised-grief-part-1 and http://birthfamily-search.adoptionblogs.com/weblogs/grief-and-disenfranchised-grief-part-2... more

Living near a large metropolitan area, I had great options for support from other triad members. Not everyone is as fortunate in that respect. In our area, not only is there a local CUB Chapter, but, several triad therapists. These therapists come from every part of the triad. Although there is at least one birth mom therapist in my area, I did not find out about her until much later. The adoptee therapist recommended to me also had a small adoption therapy group which held its meetings in the... more

Ms. Stevens fears that the result of this legislation that there will be natural parents who have no choice but to live their lives in fear of their secret being found out by other members of their family or friends.

The article goes on to say that there are adopted children who as adults may be unaware that they had been adopted and are happy with their lives the way they have chosen to live them without knowing their natural parents.

The article discusses the application filed in the Ontario Superior Court last October they argue by amending... more

Ontario’s new Adoption Disclosure Act that comes into effect September 1, 2007 will allow adult adoptees and natural parents to find out the identity of one another without the other’s consent.

Two attorneys have teamed up to challenge the constitutionality of the new act arguing that it violates the privacy rights of those individuals who wish to remain anonymous. In addition, one of the attorneys has a personal interest in the case because she found out that she was adopted when she was 14 years old.

There was an article in the Law Times at... more

At some point in my life I was able to figure out that my existence shamed my natural mother by being born. I felt guilty about being born and that I caused pain to my natural mother. I didn’t know how to correct that and after a while thought that I was relinquished to adoption because I was so bad that there was no other option.

When my natural mother gave me away I love a live mother. I felt this loss as a young child yet I wasn’t comforted for this loss. I was a child and this loss didn’t count. Society didn’t really get it either because their... more

A natural mother recently made a comment saying “I've always had the impression that to adoptee's we weren't really real. Intellectually we were but not emotionally and I think the opposite is true for us moms.”

Now, this is a huge blanket statement and although I get what the person was saying I do think that she wasn’t trying to imply all adoptees feel this way but was simply talking generally. However, it is so important for triad members to keep in mind that we all have feelings and thoughts of our own. For example, by lumping adoptees all together... more

Should birth parents from the era of closed adoptions search for their children? Is it better for birth/first parents to wait and let the adoptees search? Many birth parents are too afraid to search, and there are a whole gaggle of other reasons why most do not search.

Few of the reasons why birth parents chose not to search have much or anything to do with how they feel about their children. Birth parents do not search for a wide variety of reasons. Many of them feel as though they have no right to search. What do you think?

Although... more

When I first began posting on this subject, I intended on only one post. However, there are enough interesting blogs to mention, I decided I needed to do at least one more post on the subject.

6. Search and Reunion by Reunited Dan is another new blog for me. His mother declined contact in November of 2005. I have not read too much yet from his blog, but enough to recommend it. The male viewpoing on reunion is less documented, so I am happy to see him blogging on the subject.

7.... more

Bloggers are everywhere! They write about every subject imaginable including adoption. When time permits, I enjoy hearing from other birth parents and adoptees and their experiences with search and reunion.

Although I did not search, I have spoken to many people who have and it has given me many insights into the subject. Here are some blogs from those who are reunited or searching:

1. Relinquishing, Reunion and Journey to Adopting is a new blog that I just found. I know a few... more

I am not a big fan of state run adoption registries. They often times lack funding, advertising, promotion, funding, and I could go on and on.

Not all states have a reunion registry but below is the states that do and how to contact each.

Arkansas - State Adoption Department at: Department of Human Services, Division of Social Services: Adoption Services, P.O. Box 1437 slot #808, Little Rock, AR 72203. (501) 682-8345

Colorado - Voluntary Adoption Registry, 4210 E. 11th Ave., Denver, CO 80220. (303) 320-8333

Connecticut... more